A warped society believes Woody's selfishness is OK

The Boston Herald

Beverly Beckham

So now all of a sudden it's Mia who's the bad guy, Mia who has all the problems, Mia who's to blame for the Woody/Mia/Soon-Yi triangle.

This seems to be the latest theory. Why would anynormal woman adopt so many children? Why would any normal woman adopt children with handicaps? Mia Farrow cannot possibly be drawn to these chilren. She cannot possibly enjoy her huge brood. It has to be an act.

Therefore she cannot be what she appears to be.

Listen to what Woody Allen's sister said about her: "Mia adopts children in a manic nature - not for their needs but for hers."

Listen to what her adopted daughter Soon-Yi said: "I don't think Mia should go on adopting children and I think that all her adoptions should have been a warning signal to Woody when he met her."

Now there's solid proof. In quotes. Mia, the devoted mother of 11, (soon to be 13) with her work schedule adjusted to accommodate her children, with her apartment in the city and sprawling house in the country, with nannies and lessons and vacations for all, is a fake.

She is not and never has been a good mother. Disregard all those pictures of her with her children. Disregard her family-oriented lifestyle.

Disregard the fact that as recently as last year, Woody-the-slime-Allen praised her maternal capabilities: "Mia has a talent for mothering the way some people have a green thumb for gardening or an ear for music."

The vote is in. The past was an elaborate set-up. She did it all for show.

Now, Woody. He's for real. He may appear to be an obsessive, compulsive, jittery egomaniac with multiple aberrations and an adolescent preoccupation with sex, but, hey, he's only kidding. He's really Mr. Rogers.

"I've done the usual things with Soon-Yi that I would do with any person," he sing-songed to Newsweek. "Screen my Bergman films, go to the ball games, talk."Yup, that's Woody. Mr. Nice Guy. A fellow you'd like to be around. So he's attracted to young girls (His next movie? "Fetal Attraction") but, hey, what's the big deal. She's a consenting adult. She knows what she's doing. It's Mia who's got the problem.

And what kind of problem does Mia have?

Control. She's way out of control.

More quotes: "She just adopts and adopts in a manic frenzy," said Allen's sister.

"Mia was always very hot-tempered and given to rages which terrified the kids," said Soon-Yi.

And of course there's her much-talked-about reaction to finding nude photos of Soon-Yi in Woody's living room. She threw a chair at her daughter. Can you imagine?

Yes, I can imagine. My mother threw a sugar bowl at me once just because I'd answered a question with a flip remark.

If she'd found out I was messing around with some guy who was supposed to love her, I doubt there would have been a chair left to sit on in the house.

Mia Farrow was acting like a mother. She was angry. She was shocked. She was upset. Hers was normal behavior.

What is abnormal is the bizarre twist this story has taken. What is abnormal is a society that goes around making excuses for a Woody Allen while seeking out flaws in a Mia Farrow.

Farrow didn't have to take on the responsibility of children not her own. She chose to do this. She put their needs above her own and has devoted her life to them.

"They are wonderful people," she said of them. "If I ever allowed myself a kernel of pride in anything I've ever done in my life, it's that (they have grown up to be) young adults that I respect and whose company I enjoy...and whose social conscience I am awed by."

Despite all that's happened, she has even reached out to Soon-Yi.

Our society seems to think that because Farrow acts selflessly she has to be messed up. Allen's selfishness, however, is considered normal. That the opposite is true is an indication of how warped we've become.