February 04, 2007

Lucy's learning. But are doctors?

February 04, 2007/ Beverly Beckham

Lucy's learning. But are doctors?

When I brush my granddaughter Lucy's hair and put it in a ponytail, I always kiss the back of her neck. And she giggles. She is 3. She talks. She dances. She goes to school. She plays house and tea, and kick ball and follow the leader. She loves books and Bambi and church and playing with her cousin Adam. Lucy has Down syndrome. She looks and acts more like a 2-year-old than a 3-year-old. But is this so awful? Don't we say, "Children grow up too fast"? Lucy isn't growing up too fast. She's taking her time.

May 28, 2006

Baby Steps Came on Her Own Schedule

May 28, 2006/ Beverly Beckham

Maybe I bought the book after Lucy was born, or maybe some well-intentioned someone gave it to me. I don't remember. But here it is, nearly three years later, still next to my bed.Back then, I read it and lots of other books, looking for answers to questions. Lucy, my first grandchild, my oldest daughter's baby, was born with an extra chromosome…

March 26, 2006

WHEN LIFE DEALS A TOUGH HAND

March 26, 2006/ Beverly Beckham

WHEN LIFE DEALS A TOUGH HAND

A young man interviewed me for a college assignment, and he asked some interesting questions. "Do you think people like me inspire people like you?" He has cerebral palsy. He has difficulty walking. I walk the way I breathe, without thinking about it. His question stayed with me.

November 17, 2004

`Baby Talk' contest takes down a barrier

November 17, 2004/ Beverly Beckham

No hurt was intended. In fact, the young woman from the modeling agency was apologetic. In New York, it's different, she said. In New York, babies with special needs model for lots of companies. Boston just isn't there yet.

I didn't expect that Lucy would be chosen. I just didn't expect that she wouldn't be given a chance solely because she has Down syndrome.

November 05, 2004

Accommodating special needs is a team effort

November 05, 2004/ Beverly Beckham

The conference at Brandeis University was for teachers and it was sold out.

I too went to learn, but I likely wouldn't have gone before Lucy came into our lives.

June 25, 2004

Perfect-baby syndrome run amok

June 25, 2004/ Beverly Beckham

It hurts her parents. It hurts me. And it will hurt her someday.

The way our society deals with differences. The way her being, her existence, is a thing that scientists and doctors are working to prevent. My granddaughter, Lucy, has Down syndrome. This isn't a tragedy. But the world in which we live acts as if it is.

June 18, 2004

From Lucy, a fulfilling year

June 18, 2004/ Beverly Beckham

From Lucy, a fulfilling year

It's one year later. One year after the ground caved in and the world blew apart and the center failed to hold. One year after we were told, ``I'm sorry'' so many times that we were sorry, too.Three hundred and sixty-five days, some of them terrible. The day my granddaughter Lucy Rose was diagnosed with Down syndrome. The cold, rainy day she came home. The day the doctor said she needed heart surgery. The day of the surgery when the operation didn't go as planned. The days after, at the hospital, when we felt helpless at her side.

January 02, 2004

Sheer joy is a baby in the house

January 02, 2004/ Beverly Beckham

Oh, we have turned into a bunch of goofballs around my house. Look at us, oohing and aahing over a smile, a coo, a tiny fist wrapped around our finger, two arms fluttering like wings.

"Look how cute she is," we say 100 times a day. "Look how cute she is sitting. Look how cute she is sleeping. Look at her cute little lips and her cute little cheeks and her cute little hands and feet and fingers and toes." And on it goes - everything about this baby, exclaimed over and adored…

November 28, 2003

God's Voice Heard among Us

November 28, 2003/ Beverly Beckham

"Human beings are God's language," Rabbi Harold Kushner wrote in his book "When Bad Things Happen to Good People." He borrowed this thought from Menachem Mendel, a 19th-century rabbi from Poland. My friend, Father Coen, said it a different way. He said that we are all God's arms and…

November 09, 2003

Putting our trust in God is a healthy choice

November 09, 2003/ Beverly Beckham

"Is Religion Good Medicine?" is the question on Newsweek's cover. "God and Health." Is there a connection?

Some experts say yes. Some say no. Prayer works. Prayer doesn't.

In the end, the article says nothing new. But that's no surprise. We pray for the big things. We want the miracle. "Ask and you shall receive." And when we ask and don't get exactly what we beg for, we think, it didn't work. My prayers weren't answered.

October 31, 2003

Halloween is Lucy's buzzword

October 31, 2003/ Beverly Beckham

Her mother bought her the bee costume. She found it at Old Navy. It's a plush, sturdy thing, which, hanging on a rack even without a face, resembled a giant bee. But put a baby in it and it was a bee for sure. "An angry bee," her mother said, though Lucy looked anything but angry. Perplexed, maybe. Curious. (Why is everyone going "bzzz bzzz"?) But definitely not angry.

The costume has two layers. The bottom is a brown snuggly sleeper, and the top - the bee part - is yellow and brown and BIG…

October 26, 2003

Caring for Baby's a Timeless Pleasure

October 26, 2003/ Beverly Beckham

Caring for Baby's a Timeless Pleasure

Sometimes I pretend I'm her mother. That's OK, isn't it? Sometimes, when I'm walking my granddaughter all over town, I look up and see how much the town has changed in 35 years and how much I have changed, too…

September 26, 2003

A Yarn of Perseverance

September 26, 2003/ Beverly Beckham

A Yarn of Perseverance

It wasn’t a metaphor at first. It was just a ball of yarn. I took a picture of it, though. A close-up. I set it on my daughter’s pull out couch and clicked away intending to keep it as a reminder that perseverance pays off…

August 08, 2003

Above All, Baby's a Blessing

August 08, 2003/ Beverly Beckham

If my family were in the middle of nowhere, we would think we were happy. Plunk us on an island with no one else around and we would think it was Eden recreated. That's how charmed we'd feel. That's how blessed…

July 16, 2003

Step by step, challenges met

July 16, 2003/ Beverly Beckham

No one means to scare parents and grandparents and aunts and uncles. What they mean to do is inform, enlighten. The more you know, the better off you are, right?

Knowledge is power, right?

Except that sometimes it isn't.

My mother-in-law had a saying: "Wee steps and slow." She applied this philosophy…

June 02, 2003

Granddaughter's a Rare Gem

June 02, 2003/ Beverly Beckham

I will have to apologize to her someday. I will have to tell my grandchild that I cried the day she was born.

Not immediately. Not when I first held her and she looked into my eyes and I looked into hers. There's a picture of this. Lucy, just minutes old, almost saying hello. I never shed a tear in her first 12 hours of her life when I thought she was USDA…